Friday, February 11, 2011

Good Question.

I mean, do you? What's the next step after you realize you were super-happy for a month and one of the contributory factors to said happiness just wandered off and is probably never coming back? Do you really still have to run around thinking there's a time when everything is going to be perfect again or is okay to just push on? Does everything have to be part of some master plan that's going to lead to ultimate happiness or is it enough to just make it through sometimes?

I guess, logically (god, now I sound like Millheiser), life has to be a mixture of all of it - the pursuit, the surviving, and all the benal bits in between.

I know right now that I'm just surviving. It's what we Jedics do, we soldier on no matter the circumstances - whether it's a bruised lung or a broken heart. It stands to reason though that eventually I'll get back to the whole pursuing thing, maybe not with the person I'd like to be pursuing some ultimate goal of total happiness with, but it seems that isn't up to me any more. One can only be so reasonable, so understanding, so caring, and so supportive before it becomes the other person's job to just fucking believe you when you say everything short of "Hey, I still think you're wonderful. No matter what."
Because it's the truth.